this is NOT about politics…

i decided from the outset not to comment on the whole. sordid mark sanford mess.  i was surprised, though, 1.) by the candor of jenny (the senator’s wife) sanford’s comments, and 2.) by the vitriolic response they provoked.

DISCLAIMER:  i may be naive, but i am giving ms. sanford the benefit of the doubt.  i am assuming that she is being forthright and that her comments represent how she really feels.  i am choosing to attach no presumption of pretense, politics, irony, or marketing spin.

in that light, here is her statement in its entirety:  

I would like to start by saying I love my husband and I believe I have put forth every effort possible to be the best wife I can be during our almost twenty years of marriage. As well, for the last fifteen years my husband has been fully engaged in public service to the citizens and taxpayers of this state and I have faithfully supported him in those efforts to the best of my ability. I have been and remain proud of his accomplishments and his service to this state.

I personally believe that the greatest legacy I will leave behind in this world is not the job I held on Wall Street, or the campaigns I managed for Mark, or the work I have done as First Lady or even the philanthropic activities in which I have been routinely engaged. Instead, the greatest legacy I will leave in this world is the character of the children I, or we, leave behind. It is for that reason that I deeply regret the recent actions of my husband Mark, and their potential damage to our children.

I believe wholeheartedly in the sanctity, dignity and importance of the institution of marriage. I believe that has been consistently reflected in my actions. When I found out about my husband’s infidelity I worked immediately to first seek reconciliation through forgiveness, and then to work diligently to repair our marriage. We reached a point where I felt it was important to look my sons in the eyes and maintain my dignity, self-respect, and my basic sense of right and wrong. I therefore asked my husband to leave two weeks ago.

This trial separation was agreed to with the goal of ultimately strengthening our marriage. During this short separation it was agreed that Mark would not contact us. I kept this separation quiet out of respect of his public office and reputation, and in hopes of keeping our children from just this type of public exposure. Because of this separation, I did not know where he was in the past week.

I believe enduring love is primarily a commitment and an act of will, and for a marriage to be successful, that commitment must be reciprocal. I believe Mark has earned a chance to resurrect our marriage.

Psalm 127 states that sons are a gift from the Lord and children a reward from Him. I will continue to pour my energy into raising our sons to be honorable young men. I remain willing to forgive Mark completely for his indiscretions and to welcome him back, in time, if he continues to work toward reconciliation with a true spirit of humility and repentance.

This is a very painful time for us and I would humbly request now that members of the media respect the privacy of my boys and me as we struggle together to continue on with our lives and as I seek the wisdom of Solomon, the strength and patience of Job and the grace of God in helping to heal my family.

we could spend hours discussing the role of women in politics, christian women in politics, women in culture, christian women in culture, christian women in marriage, etc.  and we have.  ad nauseum.  i have to say, though, that i was mightily impressed by the courage and composure in this lady’s demeanor.  i am hard pressed to find any part of her position that might be vulnerable to criticism.  as usual, i underestimate the capacity for meanness in our culture.  here is a small sample of the hundreds of comments on jenny sanford’s statement:

You had me until you started quoting the bible Mrs. Sanford. This is what is wrong with the GOP. They can quote scripture all they want but God didn’t stop Mr. Sanford from cheating and you won’t get through this relying on the Holy Bible. Scripture didn’t serve your marriage then and it won’t serve you now. Seeking the wisdom of Solomon is what your base wants to hear, I know. But what someone wrote years after Solomon died are not Solomon’s actual words and an educated woman as yourself should know. If turning to fables helps then so be it, but if you really want to get through this with your kids in tact, you need a real life confidant, professional handler, family and friends, but best of all, a killer lawyer.

“Psalm 127 states that sons are a gift from the Lord and children a reward from Him.” So what are daughters – chopped liver ?

Oh please. Maybe if she wasn’t such a stuck-up bible-quoting holier-than-thou who thinks she gets to decide who can get married (and who cannot), her husband might not have had to seek the comfort of another woman. Ever think of that, lady?

 …smooth talk, lady, but you’re crazy.  Cut him loose!!

I would love just one time for a woman in this situation to stand up and say, “Hell, no, I don’t stand by him!!”

So the recipe is this:  Be as big a slimeball as you want and then, when you get caught, just start quoting the Bible.  I’m a Christian, and this is exactly why I don’t go around telling people that.  Because the folks who’ve taken over the GOP and Conservative movement and make the most noise calling themselves Christians and only using their religion as an excuse for all their crummy behavior.  These “Christians” don’t have a CLUE what the words means.

Yet another women with low self-esteem married to an elected official who can’t keep his pants on.  I would much rather hear from nothing from these wives than their line of crap which nothing from these wives which is nothing more than PR.  Go get some therapy and save us from your humiliation.  These wives are enablers

These things would happen less frequently if women would give their husbands the type of good time that they gave them before they were married.   

i don’t know…am i making too much of this?  are my expectations skewed?  it’s not that i’m surprised to “discover” that pagans act like pagans, it’s just that we’ve grown so suspicious and unpleasant.  

i sure hope ms. sanford has some friends who are christ-followers and will walk with her through this dark time.

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5 thoughts on “this is NOT about politics…

  1. No you are not making too much of this. You are right to question the vicious skepticism with which many of us view such things. I, for one, am impressed by the stand taken by Ms. Stanford and the way she refuses to let her husband wreck her belief.

  2. Hello, Randy,

    I think we get into dicey waters whenever we judge the intentions of another persons heart. If the Mrs. wants to take this man back that’s her business (btw, as of this writing, he has admitted to not only lieing about how many times he met his ‘soulmate’, but he has also confessed to numerous liaisons…all of which ended just short of intercourse).

    HOWEVER, the man is obviously a philanderer and quite possibly a sex addict. Along with all the confessions (including the fact that the other woman is his ‘soulmate’, but he’s “trying’ to make things work with his wife), I believe the Mr. Sanford should step down from office and focus on his recovery full time.

    I wonder how willing the Ms. would be to stay if her husband wasn’t in “public office”., but was married rather to….say….a construction worker.

    🙂 Hi there

  3. There are a couple of rampant problems.
    1. People are mean in cyberlandworldinterwebnetplace because they don’t have to face anyone after they blast them.
    2. People are selfish. I don’t think it’s increased, but I do think more are also accompanied by a sense of entitlement which is a volatile combination. Ask Cain and Abel. One didn’t get what he felt he deserved.

  4. Vitriolic… what a great word!

    I agree with Dave Burchett. This is a sad situation. I just wonder how many other Christian men are out there who are on the brink of making horrible decisions because they think they are alone. I also wonder how many “spiritual leaders” are, as Dave put it, suffering from the slow decay of unresolved sin that will eventually lead to their fall. I bet the answer would be shocking.

    Random point… I really loved this one part of Mrs. Sanford’s statement: “I believe enduring love is primarily a commitment and an act of will, and for a marriage to be successful, that commitment must be reciprocal.” Meanwhile, Mr. Sanford was telling the media how he met his soulmate. How did we as a society get so role reversed? She’s talking about commitment and dedication, and he’s talking about his feelings.

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